Beyond Jiu-Jitsu: From Sport to Life
As a psychotherapist, I like to dissect and analyze all aspects of my life, including my recreation as a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu practitioner.? For the past year and a half, I began retraining in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, a martial art first popularized by the Gracie family now seen in mixed martial arts like the UFC.
My entry into this sport more than a decade ago was an unusual one. ?I had no prior martial arts history (despite being Chinese), I never got into a fight growing up (people were probably scared I knew Kung-Fu) nor had any inclination to do so in the future.
I first picked up the sport in 2001 while working as a journalist in Los Angeles. ?My wife at the time urged me to learn a martial art so she could feel ?protected?. ?I thought it was a dumb idea since I didn?t have a fighting bone in my body but I obliged to give her some peace of mind. ?Since I enjoyed researching stories, I pursued this like a news story to find the most effective martial arts and decided on Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu under the tutelage of Professor John Machado. ?It was bare bones training, in a tiny room no bigger than my bedroom. ?There was no air conditioning from the sweltering heat and only a handful of dedicated men. I had no idea what I was doing and felt as awkward as someone learning a foreign language. ?But I was enjoying my time there. ?Without much of a father figure in my life, I simply enjoyed being in the presence of men, especially during a hard chapter in my life.
While some guys (and fewer gals) find?Jiu-Jitsu, my story was one where Jiu-Jitsu found me. ?Shortly after I began training, I found myself in a desperate place going through a divorce and a job loss.? I had limited support, save some friends from church whom I saw maybe once a week. Jiu-Jitsu quickly became more than a sport but a safe haven for me to connect with men on a consistent basis.? These were guys who had gone through life?s challenges with battle scars to prove it.? Yet, they persevered and maintained a positive and humble spirit. ?I wanted those attributes too and didn?t want my divorce to turn me into a bitter, calloused person.? So I trained Jiu-Jitsu with them but took away much more. ?What I learned was how martial arts is more than a sport or a hobby.? It?s a way of understanding life.
The physical component is the surface layer of the sport.? This is visible aspect of BJJ with the hours spent training, drilling, sparring, conditioning and sometimes competing. ?But underneath this lies the deeper and richer terrain, the emotional and spiritual aspects of the martial arts. ?Personal growth, self-reflection, discipline and trust in self and God.
Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu like any of the martial arts is a journey. ?They say it?s the journey and not the destination that?s important in life and that is certainly true in martial arts. ?Sure we all strive to rise to the rank of a black belt, thinking that?s the Holy Grail of training but it?s misguided as black belts will attest that even at that level, it?s just the beginning of their own learning.
As a psychotherapist, I can relate.? Even having graduated three years ago with a master?s degree in Clinical Psychology, I feel my training has just begun.? Theory and practice are all coalescing together in my specialty field of addiction, couples counseling, and group therapy.
I hunger to grow each day in my profession and ?many times feel frustrated at my apparent lack of forward progress.? This is where the mind meets the mat. ?While training in Jiu-Jitsu, I can free my mind and escape from my work as a therapist, but also reconnect with it.? Jiu-Jitsu and my work in psychology now feed off each other.
My coach (James Foster of Foster Jiu Jitsu) advises us to see the sport as a marathon instead of a sprint.?I take that same adage and apply it to life.? My short-term personal, professional, and spiritual goals must be stretched out beyond the seasons of today and viewed in terms of years or even decades.
Growth take time. ?There are many moments in my life where things just don?t seem to click for me.? Relationships, career, or just the fear of ?not knowing? what the future holds can paralyze and overwhelm me.? I can easily lose sight of the longer journey God has for me and wallow in self-pity, if not for my appreciation of the martial way. ?I used to get furious at God for holding me back.? Divorce or break-ups, getting fired or laid-off, and financial hardships topped my list of gripes against God. ?Like Jiu-Jitsu, God is using this platform to teach me that life is about embracing incremental gains and occasional setbacks.? I am also learning to submit to God?s timing.? In a similar vein, when clients ask in exasperation when they will see changes, I am reminded of God?s own whisper to me, ?trust the process?.? So whether in martial arts or in life, here?s to God?s desire for us to enjoy the journey and trust him along the way.
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Source: http://www.samlouiemft.com/2012/02/beyond-jiu-jitsu-from-sport-to-life/
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